by Michael Hall

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   Western observers looking at Islamic society tend to perceive the presence of polygyny as indicative of the low status of women.  Polygyny, a practice followed by the majority of the world’s cultures, is a “marriage pattern in which a person may be married to more than one spouse at a time” (Schultz 285).  Contrary to what we may believe, most women in Islamic societies support the practice of polygyny.  So on what grounds are these monogamous westerners making these statements?  The problem is that westerners are failing to follow a cultural relativistic policy, and are behaving in an ethnocentric manner by making these assumptions.  By failing to understand the environmental and cultural differences in Islamic societies, westerners have made the mistaken assumption that the practice of polygyny oppresses the women of Islam.

   Westerners fail to acknowledge the environmental differences that effect Islamic societies.  Looking at the population figures for most Islamic nations, there seems to be a good correlation between the number of males and females residing in those countries.  However, males tend to die sooner and in larger number than that of females.  And although overall population statistics between men and women may be equal, the male population at a marriageable age is very low compared to women of the same age (Muttahari).  So if these societies were to adopt a marriage pattern like monogamy, a large portion of the women in society would be unable to marry due to the shortage of men.  Such a situation would inevitably result in decreased birth rates which would be detrimental to society.

   In addition, westerners fail to understand the differences in cultural values among Islamic societies.  For instance, “Islam permits a man to have as many as four wives but only on the condition that he can support them equally” (Schultz 284-285).  Individuals absorbed in western ideals will see the oppression of women as the basis for this policy.  But as the statement clearly says, polygyny is only permitted if the husband can support each wife equally.  This means each woman in the relationship must be supported financially, sexually, and most important: emotionally.  For women, the practice of polygyny brings security and stability to their lives.  It also brings companionship in the form of “partner wives”.  For example, a testimonial by a daughter of a polygynous relationship states that the adoption of the practice “gave my mom a co-wife (best friend, sister, and teacher all packaged in one)” (“What”).  So in actuality, forced monogamy in these societies would be the true oppressor.

   So why do we think the way we do?  The whole idea by westerners that polygyny is oppressive to women is a judgment based on our failure to adopt a cultural relativistic policy.  We are making these assumptions based on our own cultural values.  But how do you think women in Islamic societies perceive our practice of monogamy?  Maybe they think we are selfish for not taking on another wife if we can afford it.  Of course we would disagree with such an ethnocentric statement; possibly replying, in a hypocritical manner, that it is much more complicated than that.  We really should look at our own society from their point of view.  By doing so, we may learn a great deal about ourselves.

   “Every individual, man or woman, has the right to a family life, and should have their share of comfort in having wife, or a husband, and children” (Muttahari).  We in America pride ourselves on all our human rights.  But why do we fail to acknowledge the right to be married?  In many Islamic societies, the shortage of men makes it impossible for everyone to enter into a monogamous relationship.  Contrary to what we believe, women in such societies support the practice of polygyny for its ability to bring support, stability, and companionship to their lives.  The true oppressors to these women are those who would force the practice of monogamy on these societies.  So by failing to understand the environmental and cultural differences in Islamic societies, we have mistakenly assumed that the practice of polygyny oppresses the women of Islam.

Muttahhari, Ayatullah Murtada. “Polygyny.” The Rights of Women in Islam. Tehran: World Organization for Islamic Services, 1980. Al-Islam.org. 18 Feb. 2005. <http://al-islam.org/rightsofwomeninislam/>
Schultz, Emily A., and Robert H. Lavenda. Cultural Anthropology: A Perspective on the Human    Condition. 6th ed.  New York: Oxford, 2005. 284-285.
“What Polygyny Has Given Me!!!: by a daughter of polygny.” Allaahuakbar.net. 18 Feb. 2005 <http://www.allaahuakbar.net/womens/what_polygyny_has_given_me.htm>

One comment

Baya

 1 

I live in the middle East, and have been working with Saudi women and women from all around the world. I’ve also had a chance to live in Tunisia, the only muslim/arab country where polygamy is forbidden by law. While I understand your point that Westerners need to stop looking and judging cultures around the world without a relative perspective, I would question both yours and mr. Muttahhari’s understanding of womens feelings. As a muslim women myself, and in a community of many muslim women, I think it’s absurd for you to say that it’s something that women support. I’m sure that my experience with muslim women who have been in this very situation is much more extensive than yours. I’ve lived in Senegal, a muslim african country with the highest polygamy rate among african countries, I’ve lived in Saudi Arabia, and Tunisia and morocco. And I am a women, I hear the real opinions and feelings of my sisters, and its far from what you have said, sadly. While i applaud your idea of giving the Western world a new perspective, I think you have chosen the wrong issue on which to do this. Teach the Western world not to mistake our regions cultural practices for Islamic practices. This is where the majority of mistakes of perception of Islam come from in the western world. But I’m sure that you havent heard the stories of pain and suffering that I have heard through the mouthes of the very women who have lived this painful experience. We accept it because we have to, but we do not support it. And “partner wives” are usually nightmares, for the women and her children. It is not in human nature to be able to share your mate, and often turns it into a competition which men benefit from. I feel hope and support when I hear the western world cry out for my sisters who have been through this painful time. And sir, for your information, in our religion there are very strict guidelines to taking on a second or third wife which are almost NEVER followed by Muslim men. If the first wife does not approve, he is not to take the second. This is almost always ignored, and in most cases the women are told about the second wife after the matter. And you must love and support all wives equally, which, is almost impossible. Only a small minority of people can do this, and let me tell you, it almost never works.

December 27th, 2010 at 2:33 pm

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